Toasts with a Twist by Lori Miller Fox

For me, certain times of the year seem to be fraught with emotion; my children’s birthdays, annual IEPs, and the coming of each new year. Like the changing of some apparitional guard, marked passages of time often highlight the unmet goals, untimely milestones, and overdue achievements. Sometimes, the kindest thing we can do for our children and ourselves, is to let go. Release the old and as fearlessly as possible, welcome the new. So here are my toasts to welcome in the new challenges and new successes of the New Year !

May the auld acquaintants first forgotten, be school people.

I wish for your blessings to be as plentiful, as the number of days teachers have off of school.

May your fortitude be as strong as the coffee you brew to survive, and may your life be as sweet as the chocolate you eat to forget.

Be assured, you will find the answers to your own questions, only when you question the answers of others.

To the school; if only the school would meet your child’s needs as well as they meet their own.

May you have as many blessings as you have professional appointments.

To your child’s education: may it be more appropriate than the school personnel’s behavior at IEP meetings.

May your child’s related service minutes increase as steadily as your superintendant’s salary.

A mariner’s toast: may the tide rise only as high as the school people’s expectations for your child.

May your taxes be as low as the school’s expectations of your child.

Here’s wishing that all the news you hear will be as good, as the school staff believe they are at their jobs.

May your school people’s arguments be as weak as your child’s grasp after a session with their OT.

Here’s hoping that all your child’s teachers will be as certified as the letter you send to challenge them.

May the people who surround you be as supportive as your child’s orthotics.

Always be as uncompromising in your dreams for your child, as the school team wants to be at meetings.

May your health insurance coverage be more comprehensive than the school’s accomodations, and used only as often as they provide assistive technology.

To a long life--may your days be as long as your list of unmet goals.

May you be as much a mentor to other families, as the school has been a tormentor to yours.

May you find rewards in every challenge and gratification in every effort.

May belief in your child be like stepping stones to higher expectations, and may your fears be merely pebbles to be kicked away.

May those who steal the dreams of children, one day awaken to find they slept through a miracle.

Here’s wishing you and your family a very happy, healthy 2007.

Comments

[Sandy Alperstein]

You've really got a way with words, Lori! Thanks!

[Daunna Minnich]

You know what I like best about this list? —That I can't choose which toast I like best!

[Denise Bohn]

Charlie and Lori,
Just read all of the recent posts - well said and beautifully written, as usual!
Denise

[Psych95]

Wow. What a post. I get it. You regard school personnel as the lowest of the low. It's sad that the time you spent writing that post couldn't have been spent on something that would give all of us (parents AND school personnel) some hope, encouragement, and excitement for the new year. As informational as I used to find this website, I won't be visiting it anymore.

[Charles Fox]

Psych95: I am sorry you will not be back. The toasts were meant to be in good humor, apparently you did not see it that way. You have to admit that the humor taps the well of frustration that parents feel with some (not all) school personnel.

Happy New Year to you !

[mcewen]

Oh absolutely first class - I wonder who I could forward it to?
Regardless of that, it's worth printing out, if not framing.
Very best to you and yours

[Liz]

A bit of a subject hijack here, but I just wanted to say: Happy New Year to you and yours. I wish you all the best for 2007.

[Special Ed Advocate]

Another bitter, condescending rant masquerading as humor. For 2007, may your tolerance increase to the level the school personnel needs to deal with you. I'm with Psych95!!

[Charles Fox]

Dear Special Ed Advocate: even if these toasts do not apply to Psych 95, there is certainly truth in the humor expressed here. It is unfortunate that neither you nor Psych 95 can acknowledge that some school people deserve humor being poked at that them.

[Brenda]

I just want to thank..whoever for the tears of laughter running down my face just now. I was in very much need of a laugh on the very subject. God is so good in how He provides just what we need just when we need it. laughter doeth good like a medicine. laughing to keep from crying. I could relate so very personally with too many of those jokes.